Mơ

An Englishman went to the seaside for his summer holiday. He asked the woman looking after his house to forward all the mail that arrived while he was away. She promised to do so.

He was enjoying a very relaxing holiday, but a month went by without a single letter. Thinking something must be wrong, he called her.

‘Why haven't you sent me any of my mail?’

‘Because you didn't leave me the key to the mailbox, sir.’

He apologized and promised to send her the key. On Sunday, he put it in an envelope, wrote the address on it, and posted it.

Another month passed, but still no letters arrived. At the end of the month, he returned home and complained angrily to the woman.

‘But what could I do, sir?’ the poor woman asked. ‘The mailbox key you sent me was inside the locked mailbox too!’

Từ vựng trong truyện

• forward: chuyển tiếp thư đến địa chỉ khác
• mailbox: hòm thư
• apologized: xin lỗi
• envelope: phong bì
• complained: phàn nàn

A rookie reporter at a small-town magazine was still on probation. After searching all over town, he finally found a story:

"Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. Fortunately, she was taken to Life Hospital in time and suffered only a small cut on her breast."

The editor read it and snapped, "This is a respectable publication! We don't use words like 'breast' or anything of that sort. Go back and think of something more appropriate!"

The young reporter thought long and hard but couldn't find a suitable word. Finally, he submitted this version:

"Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. Fortunately, she was taken to Life Hospital in time and suffered only a small cut on her ( . ) ( . )"

Từ vựng trong truyện

• rookie: người mới vào nghề
• on probation: trong thời gian thử việc
• respectable: đứng đắn, có văn hóa
• appropriate: phù hợp
• submitted: nộp lại

A long queue stretched outside a pharmacy, with everyone patiently inching forward. Suddenly, a disheveled man appeared, looking frantic, and pushed toward the front.

"Excuse me, please let me through! It's urgent! Someone at home is lying there waiting!" he kept saying.

The people in line sympathetically stepped aside. Reaching the counter, he panted to the pharmacist:

"Please, quickly, sell me two... condoms."

Từ vựng trong truyện

• pharmacy: hiệu thuốc
• inching forward: nhích từng chút về phía trước
• disheveled: quần áo đầu tóc xộc xệch
• frantic: hớt hải; cuống cuồng
• panted: nói hổn hển

Three Vietnamese deep-sea sailors arrived at an African port. They wanted some shore leave, but with AIDS widespread, they first went looking for a pharmacy.

They tried asking for condoms in Russian, Chinese, and English. Unfortunately, the pharmacist spoke only Wolof, so neither side understood the other.

After gestures failed, the first sailor unzipped his trousers, placed his penis on the counter, and laid a five-dollar bill beside it. "Condoms. I want condoms!" The pharmacist still didn't understand.

The second sailor put down his money and did the same. "Condoms for me too. Five dollars!"

The third followed suit. With all three men's penises and three bills on the counter, the pharmacist stood scratching his head.

Suddenly he said, "Ah!" He took five dollars from the till, put it on the counter, and lowered his own trousers. After placing his penis beside theirs, he scooped up all the money.

"Mine's the biggest. I win the lot!"

Từ vựng trong truyện

• shore leave: thời gian thủy thủ được nghỉ lên bờ
• widespread: lan rộng
• pharmacist: dược sĩ
• gestures: cử chỉ ra hiệu
• followed suit: làm theo
• scooped up: vơ lấy

Two brothers accidentally kicked their football into the neighboring garden. When they went to ask for it back, they found a man standing beside a broken vase, holding their ball.

"Did you two kick this ball?" he asked. Before they could recover from their surprise, he continued, "Thank you for freeing me from this vase. I'm a genie who was trapped inside for a very long time. To reward you for saving me, I'll grant each of you a wish. But there's one condition: you must serve me for a day."

So the brothers waited on him from morning until noon, and from noon until night. Late that night, the elder brother asked, "May we make our wishes now?"

"How old are you?" asked the genie.

"I'm twenty-five."

"How strange! Can someone really be twenty-five and still believe in genies?"

Từ vựng trong truyện

• accidentally: vô tình
• genie: thần đèn, thần trong bình
• grant: ban cho
• condition: điều kiện
• waited on him: phục vụ ông ta